MAN i love anything and everything gothic americana like think about southwestern gothic with flickering motel lights and thieves and snakes hiding in sunset deserts, but also new england gothic with deep dark woods and bodies sunk into the bottom of freezing lakes, and appalachian gothic with dirty-feet tangle-haired children and small crumbling houses and the wind whistling eerily, and even midwest gothic with lonely tractors rusting away in the sunlight and endless plains and plains of vast nothingness as far as the eye can see, florida gothic (old bones sunk into the swamp), wisconsin gothic (the town’s been snowed in for weeks now, who knows what’s happening up there), california gothic (they don’t call ‘em ghost towns for nothing), colorado gothic (something’s living up in those mountains and it only comes out at night) and of course southern gothic to rule them all, a landscape of witchery, poverty, hellfire and damnation

(via wolfbad)

I had another job interview today!

It went well! But then again, I think most job interviews go well, yet here I am, on the precipice of my sixth anniversary at the same company :(

The funny thing is that I applied for a different job at this particular publisher over a year and a half ago (and obviously didn’t get it). How many rejections from the same place can I take?


One of these hilarious #ItsFallBecause tweets will be on tonight’s pumpkin-spice-flavored @midnight!

(via hammergrip)




If something is ‘old as fuck’ then it’s about 1.2 billion years old because that’s when life evolved sexual reproduction.


However, if something is “old as balls” it’s only about 65 million years old, when placental mammals began to evolve proper testicles.

(via wolfbad)


Today’s Gender of the Day is: this passage from Walt Whitman’s “Song of Myself”


Today’s Gender of the Day is: this passage from Walt Whitman’s “Song of Myself”

(via dusktreadereats)



I am a human being, imbued with free will and the power to decide my own fate, if only on a minimal and short-term scale. I will not allow the outside world’s market forces to bait me into poor decisions. I am a glowing bubble of peaceful, deterministic light. Here is what I have re-imagined this list to be.

1. It’s pronounced “Beck-dal”, rhymes with “rectal”.

2. When you’re given a pure white egg to carry everywhere you go, and you enter the murder chamber, for the LOVE OF GOD don’t bring it ANYWHERE NEAR the gore pool.

3. Most women are made of balsa wood and paper; if you’re having trouble finding the groove, simply let them glide away on the next easterly to find a worthy partner.

4. We all know the giant container of loose change on your desk is a portion of your dowry, but we will be expecting more.

5. We are stardust. We are golden. So we will need two towels after we shower.

6. Ring-shank nails keep a better hold than vinyl-coated sinker nails.

7. Acceptable mood music includes; any pre-imprisonment Burzum, African Pgymy field recordings, Josh Groban.

8. The only part of mainstream porn that’s worth trying to imitate is when you see your enemies driven before you.

9. Don’t call us, we’ll call you. Install a landline. This is non-negotiable.

10. Sample size matters.

11. There may be several weeks of backlog before we attend to your needs. Please feel free to bring a magazine or two, and a good supply of MREs.

12. We realize your egos are fragile, and how awesome is that?

13. Learn the difference between poisonous and venomous BEFORE you come over.

"Can music go back to the days of Boys 2 Men? Or honestly back to Motown. Love was a respected thing, butts on women weren’t the main topic, and men were adorable, not predators."

— This is something one of my Facebook friends posted. Like, girl, if you think the days of Motown didn’t involve men being abusive predators, I’ve got some words for you.



the best feeling in the world is when your teacher says “these essays/papers sucked” and getting yours back with a “nice work!” and a lil smiley bc success is so much sweeter when you know others have failed 


(Source: neyruto, via yahighway)


"why the fuck am i crying"

— literally me during any situation that is slightly emotional (via nouiscult)

(Source: tommypickles, via backstagebethy)